Take Me To Post Comment Form Hi Y'all,

Being a fly has a lot of advantages.I know flies are not loved by most humans.Most of you think fly---fly strip----fly---fly swatter.I don't have any shoes ,but if you could walk a mile in my shoes( I'm being metaphorical here--work with me),you would see that flies are noble creatures and members of a very old tribe,sophisticated creatures enjoying a steaming pile of dinosaur---hmmmm--pate while mammals were busy making squeaking noises and trying very hard not to be stepped on. As a fly I am obviously not a mammal, not emotionally attached to being warm-blooded,having only two legs,bearing live young and so on and so forth and so ,therefore, I feel that I am eminently qualified to report on the follies and foibles of the human species.One of the things that I don't understand about humans is the human diet ,in particular, the things that humans insist on doing to chickens,those proud descendants of the dinosaurs.

Let me explain.Recently, I flew over to Bi Lo and observed hermetically sealed packages of what was proudly described as "Chicken Fingers." The last time I looked, chickens had not been graced with that very simian,very human appendage.So what in the heck is a chicken finger? My theory is that some of this stuff comes from Uncle Billy's Chicken Ranch--- you know the place right next to the nuclear power plant.How do you pronounce nuclear anyway? The head human seems to have trouble with that.I can imagine glowing chickens sprouting fingers everywhere-- you know like all of those cheesy sci-fi films made in the 50's.And how do you cook a chicken finger? Is it fillet of finger,fricassee of finger,finger frappe,finger fondue,finger fondant? Do humans say things like,"Hey, come to my house.We're having fresh finger tonight!" I just don't get it. And what is a chicken nugget anyway---floor sweepings? I love floor sweepings ,but somehow I get the idea that our tastes don't coincide.

Some time ago I flew over to a school cafeteria and witnessed what I can only describe as the chicken gasket.It was a circular fragment of chicken meat with a hole in the center,breaded and fried---if humans ,at least southern humans, don't know what do do with food, they fry it.Some of the humans partaking of this delicasy were speculating on the provenance of this subject of delectation.For example, there was a rather heated discussion as to just what part of the chicken was represented by the circular objects in question. And what about that very suspicious hole in the center? It was a discussion that would have made Sartre proud.

I don't get it. you humans claim to be at the top of the food chain.Ok---you certainly seem to breed like humans.But why don't you just eat food?

Musca Domestica

Next week: phosphorescent breakfast foods